Ever felt as if you went ballistic in anger or irritation and then regretted it. We have all been there and we know that anger is a most damaging emotion for ourselves and our relationships. Still we find it so difficult to control it. What I am going to suggest is that instead of controlling try to transform feelings of anger and irritation to more positive emotions. Sounds difficult but if you know the technique its rather simple. The three steps to follow are:
Pause : As soon as you feel the anger pause for 5 seconds to consider was caused the reaction.
Process: Then give yourself 10 seconds to ask the question ” is it worth damaging myself?” ( Raised BP ,Heart Rate, strain on mind etc)
Postpone: And if still you continue to feel anger postpone your reaction to another time. You need to simply say that yes I still want to be angry with this person but I will do it after an hour , a day and so on. And when the appointed hour comes you wont be as angry for sure.
I will tell you a story which will change forever the way you deal with anger. Imagine you are walking on the road and a person bumps in you really hard. Your first instinct is to react in anger, however if you turn around to give that person a piece of your mind and you see he is blind , suddenly your anger dissipates and you in fact apologise to that person . Similarly lot of people will be blind in other areas of Life so no point getting angry on them.
So next time you get angry think of this story, smile and say oh they are blind , its OK.
